My New Diet Plan

It's gone.

The magic of losing weight while breastfeeding is far gone.

I weighted 60kg before I got pregnant. I was 80kg before Charlotte popped out. 1 week postpartum I was 70kg. And then I slowly shred those extra kilos month by month. I was not one of those lucky moms who can get back to prepreg weight within a short period of time, but I did lose weight. Slowly but surely.

To be honest, I'm not sure if I lost weight because of breastfeeding. I wasn't eating on time on a regular basis. Sometimes I could go one whole morning without food until late afternoon. So when I could finally savor on anything edible, I would just gobble it down like nobody's business. Diet? What diet? I'm thankful to even have a bite of white bread, really.

Sometimes I do get to enjoy something better than white bread such as a Korean set meal, with bibimbap, soup and all the side dishes. Before I was pregnant I would be very cautious of what I eat and how much I put into my mouth. But motherhood has changed me.

I started to eat like this. Literally. 

I was concerned before but when I see my weight dropping bit by bit everyday, I feel empowered. I feel like, THIS IS IT! I CAN NOW CONQUER THE WORLD (of food)!

So for the past 15 months, I've enjoyed myself. I indulge whenever I have the opportunity and feel utterly grateful towards the universe.

But things took a wrong turn  since 2 months ago, when I started working full-time. I am still breastfeeding but my boobs are sorta free and not working for at least 10 hours a day now. I didn't think much and continue to enjoy myself whenever I can. I could eat better and regularly. And it shows. ON THE WEIGHING SCALE FML! I've gained 1 FREAKING KILO PER MONTH FML TO THE MAX LA!

SO!!!

I'm gonna do something about it. After much thought, I've made a very difficult yet beneficial decision.

I pledge to cut down on my sugar intake!

To go on a sugar-free diet will be too huge a step for a sugar-addict like me. I don't eat snacks or drink fizzy drinks but I LOVE to drink drinks! Drinks like chocolate milk, matcha latte, milk, milk tea and milo! They all contains A LOT of sugar.. and milk lol. I think making this pledge is already a huge step for me as I take at least a cup of milo every day, maybe a cup of Starbucks green tea latte once or twice a month and a cup of milk tea from Chatime once a week.

I will also try to cut down on my dessert intake. I love cakes and tarts. I mean, WHO DOESN'T!? Especially now with the half-baked cheese tart craze, I went crazy a lil. But for the sake of my weight and health (and the kaching in my purse), I'm gonna try to resist the temptation.

Hopefully by stoping all this intakes, I'll see changes in my health (and purse, seriously).

I'm not going to be too tough on myself, though. If I successfully fulfill my pledge for a month, I might reward myself with a dessert or a drink of my choice.

Ok. I'm set.

Last weight this morning was 63.5kg fml. I'll blog about my progress and hope to bring you (and myself) some good news a month later.

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I've Broken All the Parenting Rules I Set for Myself

As a first time mom, I was ambitious. I wanted to give my baby the best I could offer. Since we spent the first year together literally 24seven, I had the privilege to practice all the things that was told to be good for the baby.

No salt and sugar intake la,
no more than 2 hours screen time la,
no screen time while eating la,
no negative statements in front of Charlotte la,
always read before bedtime la,
always attend to her whenever she needs me la,
no speaking in baby language la,
breastfeed on demand la...
and the list goes on.

I am proud to say that I did it. I've passed my first year without much obstacle. If there's a score board, I think I scored 80%. I gave in 20% because of helpless situations but I'm still proud of my achievement. I feel even prouder when I get praises for what I did.

But now as I've started working, things changed.

She is now eating food with seasoning. Sometimes I try to minimize it but when she's at the nursery, I have no control over that. All I could do is to prepare her breakfast and snacks so she doesn't snack on cakes and biscuits provided at the nursery.

At home when she's agitated during dinner time as it's close to her bed time, I turn on ChuChu TV on Youtube so she could sit still to finish her meal. And also I could have some time to do all the washing up peacefully after she's done eating.

I'm sure she now has more than 2 hours of screen time besides watching ChuChu TV cause the nursery turns on Baby TV for them to watch from 4pm onwards. Sometimes they turn on a while too before lunch time.

I couldn't attend to her when she needs me most of the time cause I either need to cook for her in the kitchen, or get her water bottle refilled, or just simply need to go to the toilet and pee. Sometimes I gave up trying to cook or do whatever that can be done later and just compromise for outside food or just stay there beside her so she could comfort suck my soul out of me wtf. But again, how much can I compromise? How many times can I allow outside food to feed the both of us? So when I don't feel comfortable eating outside food, I have no choice but to put her in the playpen in front of the TV and left her crying while I prepare food in the kitchen.

This is when I've done cooking and came out of the kitchen. She refused to stand up because she's in the middle of a melt down wtf. She wanted me to carry her up instead of walking over to me herself. After I picked her up from the floor, she kept hitting my face as protest.

Sometimes I get so frustrated from listening to her crying alone in the living room I shouted in anger from the kitchen, asking her to just, please, KEEP QUIET!

It never work, obviously, cause she cannot understand yet. Instead, she cries even louder out of fear.

When we're done with dinner and bath time, I'll start her bedtime routine. Out bedtime routine consist of comfort nursing, reading, nursery rhymes, stopping her from opening and closing every drawer and cupboard, pick up the books she throws all over the floor, and repeat infinitely. Sometimes it takes a while for her to finally drift to lalaland. A while could be an hour to 2. If it takes that long, I might fold the mountain-pile of laundry and just let her do whatever she wants, like walking around clapping her hands and smile cheekily at me. I might stop in between to repeat the routine.

Sometimes it takes her less than half an hour to fall asleep. And when that happens, it means that I couldn't spend enough quality time with her. I will not be able to read or sing to her. But how much quality time is quality enough? And then I'll start to question myself if I've done enough for the day to make sure that she understands I love her? Did she get what she needed enough from me?

 I think the only thing that I am still practicing is not speaking in baby language. I used to stop people when they try to baby-talk with her.

"Charlotte, have you mum-mum?"
"Want to go gai-gai or not?"
"Go to your mummy and drink gut-gut."

Honestly it makes my blood boil when people talk to her this way. I constantly tell them that I don't speak this way and they shouldn't do that, too. But I often get replies such as,

"She's a baby ma. You say food she understands meh?" (erm, she doesn't understand mum-mum either.)
"I see baby I will automatically talk like that one wo. Cannot meh!? So babai one?"

Really. I cannot brain.

Anyway, it's been a month I've started working as full-timer and I live in guilt almost every single day. Being the sentimental one, I often cry myself to sleep. Not just because of all the rules I've broken, but also because I'm often stressed out and question myself if I've done enough.

And then I came across these 2 articles on the very same day, which was just a couple of days ago.

This article talks about how a mother is always stressed out because of the rules she set for her child. How she would just let her child cry out loud and not attend to her as so to "train" her not to be so clingy, and regrets it later when she doesn't even want to be around her as often anymore. How she wishes she could turn back time, take a step back and just be there for her whenever her child needs her.

Sounds familiar?

This other article talks about how a mom was taken back when her daughter asked her this one question, which I wish Charlotte will never have to ask. It's a really good read and it speaks to me.

This post not a boastful post nor about self-pity. I hope this serves as a reminder to any mom who is as stressed out as me, to take step back, breathe, and just live in the moment a while longer. Because before you know it, the baby that was once so chubby, clingy and difficult, will be all grown up exploring their horizons, without you. 

It's ok if she has taken a mouthful of ice-cream. It's ok if she dance and claps to the show on TV. It's ok if she's not talking yet. It's ok if she's not potty train by 3 years old. It's ok if her bumbum is marinated in poo because she's still wearing diaper. It's ok if she's not eating enough vege, as long as she eats. It's ok to give in in moderation.

It's ok cause we know we are still doing our best as a mother. 

如果媽媽沒有放松自己的心情，只想著累的日子快點過去、盼著孩子快點長大，那這一段時期的育兒之樂便只能成為泡影。
趁孩子還小，多給他們擁抱、多給他們微笑、多給他們鼓勵吧，別把遺憾留給自己，別讓后悔纏著自己，畢竟這樣的時間真不長，這樣的機會一去不復返。

At the end of the day, I know my baby still loves me dearly ♥

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Zoey's Kitchen Homemade Powders

After I wrote the post about Caring Moms Bazaar 2016 , mummy Jamie came to me to offer me her homemade powders.

I was delighted and happily accepted the offer. I mean, who would say no to homemade goodness?

She makes 3 types of powder

♥ Chicken Stock Powder - made from Chicken Breast, Himalayan Salt, Onion, Garlic, Leek & Celery

♥ Anchovies Powder - made from Quality Anchovies from Pangkor Island

♥ Vegetable Powder - made from Purple Cabbage, Broccoli, Yellow Onion, Carrots & Tomatoes. All organic except for the onion.

So last weekend, I got myself working with these powders.

First, I stir-fried some broccoli and carrot with the chicken powder.

I used it to replace salt, since it already contains Himalaya Salt. After stir-frying a bit, I add more water to soften the vegetables.

Now, let's hear the verdict.

① - Ooo, what's that mummy? I think it's calling me.
② - Okok I'm coming for you.
③ - Mummy! Put down the phone and concentrate please! My mouth is ready!
④ - There there, broccoli. You're safe in my mouth now. Go on down to my tum tum.

In other words, Charlotte approves (◕‿◕✿)

Next up, stir-fried mushrooms with Anchovies Powder.

Because the mushrooms are already flavorful, I only add a little bit of anchovies powder to enhance the flavor. 

Sorry no after-photo cause erm... I forgot to feed my camera first  (´･ω･`)

But it was no doubt tasty.

I was told not to boil soup overnight as it's not good for babies, though it'll be more flavorful. So one day, I made this simply ABC soup using only 2 chicken drumsticks, 1 potato, 1 carrot, 1 onion and 1L of water and cooked for 1 hour. When it's almost done, instead of adding salt, I added half a teaspoon of Chicken Stock Powder and 1 teaspoon of Anchovies Powder. It was AHMAIGWD so so so SOOOO YUMMY! That's how I'm gonna cook my soup from now on wards! No more boiling overnight and waste electricity (cause I'm using an induction cooker).

As for the Vegetable Powder, I used it to make omelette.

 I used 2 eggs. Beat them well and then add in 1 tablespoon of the Vegetable Powder and mix well.

Lo and behold!

Expectation.

Reality hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha (─‿‿─)

But it's yummy OK!!! And come to think of it, if your child doesn't like eating greens, this is a great way to let them eat vegetable by cooking with the vegetable powder cause it's like hidden vegie!

Also, the Vegetable Powder can be consumed directly and it taste sweet. Not sugary sweet cause the sweetness comes from the vegetables so it's very authentic. I sprinkle some on top of Charlotte's rice like ふりかけ (furikake) without having to worry if  it contains any MSG, preservatives or artificial flavoring cause it doesn't! And Charlotte loves it. So do I (づ｡◕‿‿◕｡)づ

Jamie also shared some tips for using the powder

✿ The chicken stock powder is suitable to enhance the taste of your soup, to stir-fry vege or for marinating. It's meant to replace soy sauce, table salt, or oyster sauce in your cooking.

✿  The chicken stock powder is not recommended for baby under 12 months old because it contains Himalayan Salt.

✿ Anchovies powder is suitable to put into your noodle soup. You can also add a pinch into your baby's porridge. Suitable for babies 8 months old and above.

✿ Vegetable Powder is suitable for babies 10 months old and above.

✿ Please use a dry spoon to scoop the powder.

✿ Chicken & Anchovies Powder can be kept 4-5 months in the fridge. The Vegetables Powder can only be kept in the fridge for maximum 3 months only as it's dehydrated with a dehydrating machine.

Zoey's Kitchen Homemade Cooking Powders Pricing is as below (with effective from 01/08/2016)

1.Chicken Stock Powder (Normal Chicken):-
~ RM27/80gm
~ RM33/100gm
~ RM45/140gm (full bottle)

2. Chicken Stock Powder (Kampung Chicken):-
~ RM32/80gm
~ RM40/100gm
~ RM55/140gm (full bottle)

3. Anchovies Powder:-
~ RM30/100gm

4. Vegetables Powder:-
~ RM40/80gm

- FREE delivery for orders worth RM80 and above
- There will be a delivery charge of RM8 for orders worth below RM80.
- Delivery charge to East Malaysia is RM10.

*unsalted Chicken Powder is available upon request with additional charges due to extra portion of chicken breast required.

For more information, kindly head over to Zoey's Kitchen Facebook page.

Or you can also reach mummy Jamie at 016 - 326 0909.

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