Leap day 2020

I've never really have any special feeling about leap day until this year.

This leap day, I spent it taking a counselling course in Johor Bahru. I spent 9 fruitful hours there and got really pleased with what I did for myself. And then, I spent 3 hours plus on the road in the dark trying to reach home safe and sound. And thank God, I did! Boy, driving in the dark is really something else. It was intense because I have astigmatism. It was really really taxing and stressful on the road. I had to blast songs from my YouTube list 5 volume higher so that I can sing along to keep myself awake and aware. I enjoyed my journey down South the day before more, when the sky was still bright.

 Also, this leap day, Malaysia government changed again. When the news broke, my heart sank and I could feel anger inside me. Helpless at the same time because not sure what the future holds. 

2 more minutes till application for Primary School is open. Wish me luck!

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5 Things I Learned After Getting Eyelash Extensions

I've never been fully aware of my own eyelashes. I mean, I would apply mascara when I need to dress up for a function but it didn't really bother me if I didn't.

Last year, since there were a few plans going on, I decided to try eyelash extension to look good and feel good. Here's what I think about eyelash extension.

1. The results can be drastic

I remember after getting my first eyelash extension, I got wow-ed every time I met someone. Even my daughter would ask," What happened to your eyes, mummy?". It took me some time to get used to my full and fluttery eyes, too.

2. They can be uncomfortable 

I asked for 12mm lashes the first time because I was ambitious. And not knowing what to expect, I thought that pinchy-pokey pain after it was done was "normal". If only the artist took the time to ask me about it, I think I might be able to feel other wise. After the first 2 weeks, I just can't wait for all of the lashes to fall off. The second time, 5 months after the first experience, I asked for 9mm lashes. And the result was very different. My lashes didn't feel heavy and pokey. It was very comfortable. I guess if you're doing it for the first time, try with the shortest one first and then slowly add into length and volume later. And also remember that, you shouldn't be feeling uncomfortable. If you do, tell your eyelash extension artist so that she can make adjustments.

3. They can interfere with your beauty routine

I was not able to cleanse or rinse my eye area as the extensions weren't meant to get wet.

4. They can wreck your natural lashes

As the lashes falls off on their own, they usually fall together with your real lashes. The last eyelash extension I had almost wreck all my lashes. The artist recommended the Y shape eyelashes as she said it's easier to maintain. The tip of the eyelashes crosses each other. And for some reason, when it falls, a whole patch falls off together.

This resulted in a bald patch and it bothers me s lot!

After 2 days, I couldn't take it anymore and used coconut oil to remove the rest.

5. It’s an addictive (and expensive) beauty treatment and it messes with your self-image. 

Now that my eyes look "bald", I'm a little horrified devastated to see how much damage they had done. I keep having the urge to give the eyelash extension artist a call for another treatment but I also know that I don't have many lashes left to attach the extensions to.

I'm now on the road to growing my lashes back, but it's amazing to finally be able to rub my eyes again.

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Cousins

Growing up, I find companionship in my cousins. I have 10 cousins altogether. And they said, cousins are your first best friends. Of course I was not close to all of them. Mainly the 2 who were close in age.

But life, as we know it, doesn't always keep one's path align with another forever. How sad.

This year, I have this student who reminds me of my 2 cousins who decided to cut ties over money since my grandparents passed away. Sepet eyes with the surname Tan. Absolutely coincidentally look-alike for sure. But it somehow makes me wonder if they are alright. Is the one working in Hong Kong still safe and sound? Do they have their own family yet? Do they missed their dad? Do they, for a second, reminisce the past we once shared?

Occasionally, I also thought about her. How did she cope with her miscarriage? She should be fine, I guess? Being a counseling volunteer, she would know who to go to or how to handle the grieve, I think. Is she still the same ol' same ol' or a more selfless person now?

Don't worry about me. I've moved on. But I'm only human and my feelings are valid. And I can't help when something triggers my memory.

I wish them well. I wish them enough in life.

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3 Tips on How to Survive A Trip and Not Break A Friendship

Sereen and I talked about going on a trip many years ago when we were still childless. After having 2 kids of our own, with the elder one being 4 years old and could appreciate traveling more, we decided that it's about damn time.

We decided to a short trip to somewhere near, so Singapore it is. Not really a good idea after all cause Sereen said, and I quote, "So near but so expensive."

I know. It's Singapore ma.

I'm not gonna elaborate on the itinerary because we didn't have a solid one as we're travelling with kids. But if you really need to know, we went to The Gardens by The Bay, Singapore Zoo and Orchard Road.

What I'm going to write about is the things I learned about travelling with your bff and kids!

I guess without prior experience, we didn't really know what to expect. But through this first experience, here are the top 3 tips on how to survive the trip and not break the friendship.

1. Plan loosely

We didn't have a tight itinerary like where to eat or what to do and where to go. The whole trip was kinda children-centered. So we decided on The Gardens by The Bay, Singapore Zoo (with Jungle Breakfast with Wild Life in the morning) and Orchard Road to see the Christmas deco. We decided on what to eat there and then with Google being our tour guide. Besides rushing through The Gardens by The Bay on the first day because we only arrived at 7pm, we enjoyed our trip to the zoo the next day leisurely. Ok, we did rushed a lil in the morning so that we could get a nice spot to see the animals at the Ah Ming Cafe. Otherwise, we took our own sweet time to explore around. And at night, we went to Don Don Donki at Orchard Central (because yours truly is a fan of everything Japanese), had dinner there and walked along Orchard Road to see the Christmas decorations. Tiring at the end of the day but considered ok as we didn't have an ultimate goal to achieve so there was no pressure.

2. Separate all the spending

Besides hotel and flight, where one of us paid in advanced for everyone and then share equally later, we spent and paid for everything separately later. We didn't have a "tabung kongsi". When Sereen suggested this, I was honestly a little upset cause I was like, "Why? Are we going to do all things separately?"

Then I realized it's the best practice throughout this trip.

Ours and our kids' food preference are different. While Charlotte and I are quite open to try new things, Sereen made it clear that her son, Mason, is quite a China man and he needs his rice. So even if we decide to eat something else, she would need to dabao a dish with rice for Mason to eat, which I don't think it's a very good idea at all. So we dine in food courts where there's a variety of food to choose from without having to compromise anything.

On he last day before our flight back together, we spent the entire time almost separated, alone with our own kiddo. I felt it was necessary and much needed cause I hardly get to have 1-on-1 with Charlotte since Emmett arrived. Needless to say, we spent everything separately, too. So it was indeed a wise decision to not have a shared allowance.

3. Discipline your own kid

I must say, traveling with your kid and your friends’ kid is a test of friendship. When you travel, and your kids don’t know each other much and or never been into a playdate, it is hard to be in between with the two. They get jealous of each other and sometimes is so hard to handle! But one thing for sure is that Sereen and I both know the boundaries. She handles her kid, and I discipline mine. And when it comes to sharing, if one doesn't want to share his or her own things, we respect the kid's decision and the mother will handle her own jealous kid.


Truth to be told, traveling with kids is exhausting. Their nap time doesn't sync, sometimes we have to wait out a tantrum. It felt like I needed a vacation from our vacation. But at the end of the day, we built memories together. Few years later we could maybe laugh about it.

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