Let me start off with Charlotte attending nursery for the first time.
My initial plan was to send her there an hour or 2 the first day, and then gradually increase the hours throughout 2 weeks' time until she's more comfortable with the new environment. But since I only had one week left before starting my new job, I had no choice but to go cold turkey.
So on the 1st of August, 2016, the first day of sending her to the nursery, I let us took our time to slowly wake up. Slowly as in for her to nurse as long and as much as she wanted and for me to just take in every moment and emotion I had.
After we're both settled, we had breakfast at a cafeteria nearby. I fed her her breakfast I prepared and had mine quietly. Then we headed to the nursery together. It was a long ride. Well, the distance was a long one anyway. So I prayed. I ask the Lord for forgiveness, for only seeking him when I needed to. I also ask for His protection over her. Keep her safe, let her enjoy herself and have a good rest.
We reached the nursery around 11.45am. It was almost nap time for the kids. Charlotte was feeling rather sleepy, too, as she almost dozes off in the car while we were on our way. I quickly nursed her. I brushed her head over and over again, while telling her not to cry too much and try to take a nap. I also reassured her that I'll be back very soon to get her home. My water pipe was already broken the moment I stepped into the nursery and it couldn't stop leaking until I left. The moment I handed her to the carer it was basically waterfall pouring for the both of us. But my experience as a kindergarten teacher told me that leaving the scene as soon as possible is the best for all of us. For the carer to settle her down, for Charlotte to calm down soon to register what's going on and for me to pick myself back up.
I went into the car and cried my lungs out. It was a really heartbreaking moment but I embraced it. I honored my feelings and I allowed myself to cry as much and as loud as I needed to. Honestly, I felt so much better after that.
I went back almost 4 hours later as I had a meeting with someone nearby. I called the nursery twice in between to check on her. The second time I called was almost around 3.30pm and she hasn't taken her nap then. So I rushed over to pick her up. But when I was there, I saw her sleeping in a carer's arms. She has finally gone down for her nap 5 minutes before I arrive.
Here she's sleeping alone in the room cause the rest of the kids were already up from their naps.
It was heartening to see how tired and worn out she was but at the same time I felt relieved cause she's finally taking her much needed rest. So I left her there and went to a nearby Starbucks to wait for her. I went back an hour later to wake her up and brought her home.
According to the carer, she cried for half an hour before settling down. According to the carer, Charlotte was considered an easy baby (toddler) cause there are others who would cry the whole day.
She continued to go to the nursery the next 3 days and we were both making progress. According to the carer, she would only cry for about 10 minutes before settling down. After that she would walk everywhere exploring everything. She would also mingle with her friends. She takes her food well and eats a lot too. I, on the other hand, shed some tear on the second day and felt alright from then onward. Maybe because I get updates from the carer everyday or whenever I call in to check on her so I feel fine and 放心. So I guess it's either God hears my prayer or God hears my prayer lol.
Hopefully soon, we can bid farewell happily every morning.
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